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The Blog, online dating minus ugly people

The Blog, online dating minus ugly people

…,online dating minus ugly people

If you’ve recently joined the flirtatious throngs of ridiculously good-looking people here on DarwinDating.com, chances are decent that the upcoming month will mark your very first holiday season with a scathingly hot and altogether superior significant other at your side.

My advice to you is thus: Don’t F this up.

A duo who gave each other good Christmas gifts, clearly.

Yes, the holiday season presents a virtual relationship minefield of potential miscommunications and missed expectations, not to mention the undoubtedly appalling prospect of being introduced to your hot playmate’s parents and getting a peek of just how pitiful life will be once the beauty has faded and only the badly vacuous, supercilious personality remains.

But I digress. My point is: all that jolly Noel crap is going to be worth it. Firstly, you can look forward to stoking the holiday spirit with a little under the mistletoe nookie. And all it takes to get smooches on Fresh Year’s Eve is standing within Five feet of someone attractive and vaguely leaning in their direction. And Valentine’s Day? Guys, have you seen the kind of stuff gorgeous women wear on Valentine’s Day? Best comeback on a dozen roses you will EVER get.

So, Ladies and Gents, here’s how to not F-up your very first Christmas with a date that is way too good-looking for you:

1) Think of gifts that serve her interests, not yours. She loves kayaking, but you got her a sweet fresh board in hopes it would turn her into a surfer chick? And hey, if it doesn’t, surely she won’t mind if you borrow it from time to time, right?

Two) Don’t be stingy. A discount $Ten DVD is an awesome bounty for your little brother. But for a high-class beauty, you better be thinking something a bit more exotic. Sure that costs moolah, but if you want to date a Ten, you better reminisce ABE: Always Be Earning.

Three) For god’s sake, DON’T GIVE A Bounty CARD. Bounty Cards are a fine bounty for your kid’s teacher, the lawyer who got you out of that DUI, or maybe that boy who does your taxes. They are NOT OK for anyone you’re sleeping with, or one day hope to sleep with.

Now, if all of that sounds a little too much work, I am truly sorry (not truly). I know what you’re thinking:

I’m pretty hot myself, I did after all get accepted in to Darwin Dating, shouldn’t my shiny fresh significant other, hot as they are themselves, nonetheless be grateful to have landed a catch like me?

Friend, that’s B-Level talk right there, and Mr. Charles Darwin intended his site to be a gathering place of Alpha Masculines and Females, with looks that excel beyond all others, leaving no room (or even desire for room) for consideration of other qualities, or indeed, others. So that’s how it’s going to go down.

Love the mating!

The many benefits of dating a DarwinDating member.

We get a lot of emails at Darwin Dating but this one is something fresh!

I love your website and I am writing as I am an undefeated boxer and also a kidney donor and also a human billboard I have 6 permenent tattoo advertisements so far of various websites and companies and would love to advertise for you as well with a permenent tattoo advertisement.I have a lot of areas left to advertise on that would be seen by millions and millions across my life. it would be lifetime advertising and would get superb media coverage I have been in the press for boxing and for donating a kidney and for being a human billboard. if you would like to see press I have been in please email me back Id be blessed to send that to you.

we would even do it on my eyelids on each eye lid or we could even do it on my forehead please email me back

I would advertise whatever you desired your website or twitter id anything you like it would get us both a lot of exposure and I would do it very very cheap just because I like your site so much

Thanks for the suggest Billy, but I don’t think I’ve ever seen an attractive boxer. Perhaps if you make it into the site very first we might be able to talk. ??

David Spark wrote about Darwin Dating on Mashable.com and heckled our blog as being poorly updated! Our last post was 6 months ago, fair enough.

If you had an application fee, you could alway reimburse it to the hot people who get accepted! This way, the ugly people would end up paying for wasting everyone’s time.

From Darwin Dating:

Welcome to the harsh reality of life, you are not attractive enough to make it onto Darwin Dating and very likely aren’t very attractive, period!

There are slew of other ugly people out there and we have proof. Many people who have applied for membership have been rejected. ‘,Successful’ people like Russell Crowe, George W. Pubic hair, Venus and Serena Williams and Margaret Thatcher would never have been made members, so maybe there is still some hope for you.

There are slew of products out there that may help reduce your ugliness. Attempt a few of these: hair gel, contact lenses, soap.

Related movie: Songify This – CAN’T HUG EVERY CAT (now on iTunes) — a song about loving cats

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